No woman will make a good godly wife if they are proud, and wish to take on the role of the husband, which is to lead as the head. And no man will make a good husband who does not take his role of being the head seriously, stirring the woman up to good works and love by giving her reasons to submit to him as the head by his godly speech and behavior.
If a woman wants to be a good wife, she must help the man be a great head, not by being an example of a head herself, but by respecting the man (Ephesians 5:33). When a man is framed and treated as someone to be respected, he is likely to naturally, degree by degree, come to fit within that frame like a picture fits into a frame, because a man is prone to behave according to the way he is treated.
If a man wants to be a good husband, he must love his wife (Ephesians 5:25). He must adore her and assure her often of his love, the same way Christ assures us, His Bride, when we have doubts of belonging to Him and being loved dearly by Him. On those occasions, He often makes sure to smile upon us and send some token of His love to us, gently blowing on the coals of our heart in order to kindle a flame of His love to warm our soul.
Although it is the woman’s duty to respect the husband, he must strive to give her many reasons to do so, so that reproach may never be put his account for a lack of effort, and so that he does not put the entire burden on her to search through so many tall weeds with all her strength in order find a single flower of what’s respectable.
Christ appears and reveals Himself to His bride as one to be submitted to, and worthy of being submitted to, not just because of His authority, power, and wisdom, but because of His overwhelming love, and husbands are called to love their wives the way He does. We are being conformed to His image, and the image should always have a likeness to the real thing.
This content belongs to Joshua Arnold
and has been re-purposed with his permission.